Ok so let’s talk life! (Insert stressed emoji face. Whichever one you want lol.) When I tell you ever since the blog went live, the past few weeks have been emotionally draining, believe me, they have. From multiple random encounters with people from my past, to dealing with the election and the aftermath (we’ve survived worse), to being forced to deal with releasing toxic folk from my presence, all on top of losing a dear friend unsuspectingly. I’m telling you! Hoooney! Omg! It’s all had me like “ok what is uuuup??” Like can I just be blissful and great in these skreets please?! (yeah I said skreets)
“The path to finding yourself will make you cry, drain you, test you, offend you, break you; And yet – it will make, strengthen, and evolve you.” -Lalah Delia
Honestly, seriously, truly (@iambrandens voice) like those words embody exactly what I’ve felt maneuvering through these past few weeks, the crying, draining, testing, offensive, breaking part that is lol.
So one day I’m sitting on my bed looking at my dry erase board and there was my answer to my why, staring me in my face. It’s an affirmation I often repeat to myself. “I hereby release anything and everything that is blocking the flow of love and abundance to me now.” Aside from losing my friend, that affirmation seemed to be totally manifesting in my life. Like it seriously had been a series of making closure one by one; whether I had to speak directly to the person or make closure within. Hey, they say watch what you ask for, cause you just might receive it.
“Everything thrown our way is for our betterment if we so choose. Everything passed our way is passed our way for us to eventually score if we so choose.” -Tracy G
Perspective is everything. Closure was the universe clearing the way and making room for better to come into my life. The universe was manifesting exactly what I needed! Did it feel good? Hell No! But I had to snap out of it! Life was still moving on and I needed to do the same. So I thought I would share my top 10 ways on how I get my mojo back when life throws me a couple of tough cards.
1. I make sure that I deal with the emotion and feel it. I’m honest. If I’m angry, hurt, and/or sad, I’m honest with myself about how I feel. I allow myself to move through that feeling. Be gentle with yourself. Some things take a little more time than others.
2. I communicate. I vent. I cry. I laugh. I gain feedback and new perspective. I get honesty. Whether I’m initiating some of these things for myself or reaching out to someone in my circle, I make sure to do it. It’s a form of release for me and helps to shift my energy. Make sure your tribe truly matches your vibe. I always make sure to at least have one person I can reach out to.
3. I take a moment. I take some time to get back on my feet and get my sh*t together. Some people tend to bury themselves in their work when they’re stressed. With me that’s not the case. Most of the time, I need a moment. I need a moment to do those things in step 2. Then honestly, I usually gain my inspiration back and can get back to work.
4. I read. I enjoy reading and this is my go to even the more when I’m stressed. I research. I learn something new. New information is always a motivating force for me. I read inspiring passages, books, and quotes. The purpose is to redirect my mind and thoughts. Gaining control of them is more than half the battle.
5. I do something creative. I take on a new project or finish an old one. It’s always good for me to channel my energy in a creative way. Y’all already know I love DIY and sewing projects. It could also be a project for someone else.
6. I meditate. This is a good way for me to center myself. Breathing slowly and deeply is always calming and a good way for me to try and relax and bring my focus back in. It takes practice but it helps me calm my nerves and to focus on the present.
7. I turn up my nice barometer. Whether at work where I’m constantly dealing with people or outside of my job. I try to go out of my way by extending myself. People love great customer service and they’ll reward you with positive feedback. (Sure, I don’t mind helping, let me see if I can help you with that or point you to someone who can, oh I don’t mind at all, that’s what I’m here for, it’s no problem at all) All of that breeds a host of positive reinforcement. (Thank you so much for your help, you just made my day easier, I really appreciate you, you’re awesome for this, and a simple Thank You!) It’s true. It goes a long way. I use all of those positive reinforcements to help build myself back up. Again these things go a long way. It puts a smile on my face and gives me a warm and fuzzy feeling on the inside. And Voila! I’m not focused on my situation anymore.
8. Self care… who doesn’t enjoy self beautification. That always makes me feel better, whether it’s making up my face, putting on a nice outfit, going for a mani/pedi or a massage. It’s all about generating good feelings so I can return to being the best version of me that I can be. Vibrating higher is what it’s all about!
9. Music is also a good way to help get me back on track. I loooooove old school music. It’s just the old soul in me. But I also try to listen to something empowering, uplifting, with a message that will also remind me of who I am and where I’m headed. Or a little ratchet trap music never hurt too, right?! (Lol) Anything with a feel good tune to get my vibration higher, I’m here for it. I try to avoid the music that puts me in a lower vibration. The goal is to vibrate on a higher level, Always!
10. Gratitude. Ah! Gratitude… Find things to be thankful for. This is always helpful to me. It’s the simple things we forget about… being alive, being able to provide for ourselves, being healthy, having family and friends that support and love you. I could go on and on. Sometimes I forget how fortunate and blessed I am, but the attitude of gratitude it always a healthy reminder.
The moral of all this is life happens sometimes and sometimes it knocks us off track. But the goal is to know how to get back on. Refocusing and focusing take practice for many of us. So if or when you somehow get off and wander a little, it’s okay. Create a list of things for yourself that make you feel good or feel free to try your hand at some of mine. Most importantly remember to be gentle with yourself, your process and your journey. This is something I constantly have to remember.
Now because I never want to take myself or life too seriously, I came up with a short list of additional things to do to make me feel better when life throws crazy sh*t my way. Lol enjoy!
Wild card list:
-Make you a couple of crispy slices of bacon and eat them proudly. I promise it’ll make your life feel better, at least for the moment. (lol)
-Moisturizing your face and scalp, and keeping those lips greased lol #staychapandashfree
-Working out (there is no greater feeling than seeing those pounds shed and getting a good sweat on too!
-Landscape in all the right places. It’s like a refreshing feeling like wooo and personally makes me feel like I’m every woman.
“Don’t take yourself too seriously. Know when to laugh at yourself, and find a way to laugh at obstacles that inevitably present themselves.” -Halle Berry
I’d love to hear from you and some of the ways you bounce back on track. Also share this post if you found it to be helpful.
Until next time…